How I Handled Grieve In My Business
I have lost quite a few people in my life. However, nothing prepared me for the loss of Raheem Toure last year. A brief history of who Raheem is. On this faithful day, November 1st, 2018, I received a message on my Instagram page (see image below) from a stranger who showed interest in my brand (Glammednaturallyoil). As I get a lot of these sorts of messages, I tend to ignore them and move on. However, something struck my attention about his message, His sincerity, and heart of service caught my attention. Before this day, my business was in its early stage.
I took a chance on Raheem, and after our first meeting, I knew he was sent from God. He told me Jummie give me 6 months to show you how I can transform Glammednaturallyoil. I honestly wasn’t sure what that meant exactly, but I knew I couldn’t take Glammednaturallyoil to the next level without God and a team. So He became my first employee, and we started building together. He introduced me to the world of marketing, and within 6 months we more than tripled in sales.
Fast forward 3 years later, I received the shock of my life! After speaking to Raheem the day before when He told me He was in the hospital for a stomach infection. I found out on Instagram a day later that Raheem passed away at the age of 22 Years Old.
I wasn’t prepared for this! My business partner and friend is gone forever. The next few months after his death I was in zombie mode in my business. The mistake I made was not to grieve properly. What choice did I have, I had to keep the business going, I lost interest in my business, and I lost every sense of creativity, I was still working but my heart was no longer in it.
Grieve does this to you, so how did I handle the loss of my business partner you might ask, how did I survive it? Did I fully recover from His loss? The answer is No, I haven’t fully recovered from His loss, but God is seeing me through. I am now able to write about this and share this with anyone in the same situation. Grieving is natural but it hurts, and I hope these few tips will help you grieve in a better way.
Cry! Let It All Out
Jesus wept for Lazarus when He died, Crying is not a form of weakness. I read somewhere that Crying also stimulates the production of endorphins, our body’s natural pain killer which triggers a positive feeling. The first few hours of hearing about Raheem’s death I was in shock for the first hour that I didn’t cry until after I realized this was a reality. Anytime I think of him I still shed a tear or more, in fact as I write tears are coming down my cheeks.
Don’t postpone your grieving process
Grieve on time – What do I mean by this? Ok, take my journey for instance, as I mentioned above, I dove right into business mode, I didn’t take time off to grieve or reflect on the shock my emotions suffered. Because of this, at the end of the year, I crashed emotionally. It took the grace and mercy of God to see me through such a difficult time in my business.
Take time to reflect on the positive
Let me explain this further, so Raheem died too young, but in his few years of knowing him He fulfilled his purpose. He came into my life and within 6 months transformed my life and business. So anytime I think of him, I choose to remember the good and legacy he left behind.
Surender your Grieving process to God
I questioned God so many times as to why He had to leave too soon. If I didn’t give him a chance, I wouldn’t have known he existed. I needed closure, and I asked God to help me heal. I have a gift of dreams and 9 months after I was taken to where he was buried in Ivory Coast in my dream to say my final goodbye. Not everyone has this gift, but God is so faithful, He will connect with you in the right way and right time to give you closure. I honestly felt better after that dream.
As part of surrendering my grieving process to God, I also journaled my process, I journal differently, I journal prophetically. In prayers and in faith, I completely surrendered my emotions to God. Those days when I remember him, especially in my business I say a prayer for the family he left behind. Imagine, if I am feeling this way, how much more they miss him.
Don’t grieve alone
Bring others with you so you don’t go into depression. I became closer to Raheem’s Mom, I stayed connected with her and prayed for her. I also included my husband in this process, He knew Raheem and was very fond of him. He became part of our business family, so it was a loss for our entire family and team. I also involved my business team members in my grieving process, we chose a day every year in February to celebrate his legacy.
Yes, there is no day in my business I do not think of him, with the help of God I can handle this grieving process better and keep Raheem’s Legacy going. I hope this encourages you If you’ve experienced a similar situation. This too shall pass and each day will get better.